‘Sherlock’: 10 Funniest Quotes from Watson’s Wedding

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“Sherlock”

[Warning: spoilers ahead for Sunday’s episode of Sherlock, “The Sign of Three.”]

Raise your glasses to John and Mary, Sherlock‘s newest married couple. The PBS/BBC series continued season three with a wedding, an attempted murder and one epic best man’s speech. And there’s also Sherlock’s (Benedict Cumberbatch) big deduction — that John (Martin Freeman) and Mary (Amanda Abbington) are going to be parents.

Q&A: ‘Sherlock’s’ Amanda Abbington on John/Mary’s Wedding and a Dark Shift

Below The Hollywood Reporter counts down nine of the best quotes from the episode. Check out THR‘s list from last week’s premiere, as well as a Q&A with Sherlock actress Abbington here.

1. “Do you know any funny stories about John?” — Sherlock to Lestrade
“What?!” — Lestrade
“I need anecdotes. You didn’t go through any trouble did you?” Sherlock to Lestrade, who left an important crime scene and ordered “maximum backup” when Sherlock texted him for help

2.I think from now on we’ll downgrade you to casual acquaintance, no more than three planned social encounters a year and always in John’s presence. I have your contact details I will be be monitoring.” – Sherlock grilling Mary’s ex David
“They were right about you. You’re a bloody psycho patch” — David
“High-functioning sociopath—with your number.” Sherlock, with a big smile

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3. “The thing about marry is she has completely turned my life around. Changed everything. For the record over the past few years there are two people who have done that, an the other one is – a complete dickhead.” — John giving Sherlock a heartfelt speech, only to discover the detective has left his side

4. “What are you doing back? I thought you were going to be up late.” – Mrs. Hudson, finding Sherlock and Watson drunk on the stairs
“What time is it?” — Sherlock
“You’ve only been out 2 hours.” — Mrs. Hudson

5. Don’t worry, I’ll find him in 10 minutes. What’s your dog’s name?” – Drunk Sherlock to a woman who thinks he’s dating a ghost

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6. “It took him years to confide in me.” – Sherlock, at John’s wedding, talking about learning his friend’s middle name”
“That’s my birth certificate.” — John, in a flashback to how Sherlock actually learned the middle name

7. “As a mental exercise, I’ve often planned the murder of friends and colleagues. Now John, I’d poison. … I’ve given him chemicals and compounds that way and he’s never even noticed. He missed a whole Wednesday one day.” — Sherlock

8. “Now, let’s talk about murder – sorry did I say murder, I meant to say marriage?” – Sherlock during his speech, as he’s trying to figure out who the Mayfly Man is

9. “You are not a puzzle solver, you never have been. You’re a drama queen. Now there is a man in there who’s about to die. The game is on. Solve it!” – Watson to Holmes on why he can solve the Invisible Man case now that there is a life on the line

10. “I love dancing. I’ve always loved it.” — Sherlock, revealing he has more of a human side than he lets on

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