In a world where television judges refuse to remain impartial, what America needs is one honest Brit -- or at least that's what a new promo released the The X Factor would have us believe.
PHOTO: 'X Factor' Season 2: Meet the Contestants
"Britney Spears flirts with contestants...Demi Lovato crosses boundries..and L.A. Reid is suggestive...on both sides," screams the new commercial, cleverly fashioned like one of those annoying political advertisements cluttering up the airwaves for the election season.
So who can a reality television viewer turn to in their time of despair? How about a man who "cares about himself, 100%"? That man is Simon Cowell.
The cheeky promo wraps up with a declaritive statement: Simon Cowell. Best. Judge. Ever."
"I'm Simon Cowell, and I approved this message," intones the salty judge.
X Factor will return Nov. 1, if there isn't a baseball game.
Watch the promo below: