I don’t even remember how to flirt.
Anniversary
What it usually means: Celebrating every month or year with flowers, and Hallmark cards, and cutesy gifts.
What is means now: Making last-minute dinner plans every 365 days.
Closeness
What it usually means: Allowing yourself to be emotionally vulnerable.
What it means now: Investigating a questionable mole on your S.O.'s butt crack.
Spooning
What it usually means: Sleeping in each other's arms, sometimes for an entire night.
What is means now: Something you do for about two minutes until someone's arm goes numb, and you roll to opposite corners of the bed to actually sleep.
"We should go out"
What it usually means: A casual way to ask someone you're interested in to go on a date with you.
What it means now: What you say to your S.O. when you realize you've been indoors for an entire weekend and you can't remember what sunshine looks like.
