Did they get engaged too? What is this, an epidemic?
Jim Henson Company
1. Is everyone getting engaged but me?
2. Is there no law against inviting people to be a "fan" of their page?
3. Whose baby is this? When did everyone get a baby?
4. Is it rude to unfriend someone from high school?
5. Wait, who the balls is this person?
6. Are they actually gay or just "married" to their friend as a joke?
7. When did I become such a stalker?
8. Do people find me interesting online?
9. Why do people post so much about their private lives online?
10. Does no one use spell check?
11. They know that they're not actually going to get two free airline tickets to Hawaii from reposting this, right?
12. Why do so many animals have their own Facebooks?
13. What will happen to my Facebook when I die?
14. Is "Facebooked" a verb?
15. How do I stop these goddamn notifications?
16. Should I take this quiz?
17. How do I change my setting to be super-duper private?
18. No one can see that I'm stalking them, right?
19. Why are you posting about your political beliefs again?
20. To your new work crush: Why won't you accept my friend request?
21. Why aren't there more pictures of your dog on here? (I'm not even kidding, your dog is adorable.)
CBS
22. Why are there so many hashtags?
23. Is it just me or does this person drink a lot of coffee?
24. Is this actually #nofilter? It looks like there's a filter on here.
25. Should I be eating more brunch?
26. What app did they use to make that border?
27. What filter is that?
28. Do they even have a job? How are they always on vacation?
29. Does Beyoncé know you're not supposed to post more than one photo in a row?
30. HOW DO I UNLIKE THE PHOTO I JUST ACCIDENTALLY LIKED WHILE STALKING THIS PERSON?
31. Do they know I'm stalking them now?
32. Is my life boring?
33. * turns phone * What is this even a picture of?
35. Are you still supposed to like the picture if they post a picture of them being injured? Or do you just comment, "Are you OK?"
36. Who is that other person in the photo? Are they dating?
37. Whose dogs/cats are these? When did everyone get a pet?
38. Why did this photo only get 10 likes? Should I take it down?
39. What hashtag should I use?
40. Are hashtags overrated?
41. * when a video automatically plays * AHH, WHAT IS HAPPENING?
42. Why is their profile private? How will I stalk them now?
