“Definitely starting my diet tomorrow.”
"I'm going to wake up early and get a head start on my day."
What You Mean: I will incorporate the sound of my alarm clock into my dreams and hit snooze 30 times before being late for work.
Cartoon Network / Via rebloggy.com
"I'm definitely going to the gym after work."
What You Mean: OMG, literally 50 unexpected errands just came up that are all non-urgent but I absolutely should do immediately. Too bad about the gym, huh.
Cartoon Network / Via cartoonnetwork-.tumblr.com
"Just a couple of drinks. I need an early night tonight."
What You Mean: Come back in four hours to watch me sing "Closing Time" with this bartender, my new best friend.
Cartoon Network / Via 2damnfunny.com
