United States of Whatever.
New York
Ah, New York — the center of the universe! At least, that's what you tell yourself when you pay $2,000 a month to live in a roach-infested shoebox. You feel like you live this *FABULOUS* NYC lifestyle but it's probably more Girls than Sex and the City. Your diet is essentially a lot of pizza and bagels. Also, you probably see a lot of weird shit on the subway. And what IS that smell that is always wafting through the streets?!? Hint: It's a mix of garbage, urine, and pretzels.
Los Angeles
You might be an actor (aka you wait tables before you catch your ~big break~) or maybe you do something else with your time; either way, there is a 95% chance whatever you do is PERIPHERALLY connected to the entertainment industry. You LOVE the weather, kale, and juices, but you also spend a large chunk of your day in traffic — most likely in a Toyota Prius.
MTV / Via buzzfeed.com
Chicago
Summers are spent at Cubs games (or drinking on the rooftops across the street) and also enjoying the few days a year where the city ISN'T an Arctic tundra. You have this weird need to defend Chicago against New York, like you're the little sister or something, and you KNOW better than to call it anything other than the Sears Tower. One thing you DO know is Chicago pizza is better than New York pizza. Also, people are just NICER in the Midwest. AND GOOOOOO BLACKHAWKS!
Dallas
Ugh, you're probably in a pool of your own sweat because it's the summer. You live and die by the Cowboys because they are AMERICA'S TEAM. Maybe you went to UT or SMU, and you definitely love getting ~dressed up~. Also, most of your friends are either engaged or they're married, even though you're like 25. Whatever. Also, barbecue is a BIG BIG BIG DEAL in the BIG D.
Tom Pennington / Getty Images
