To the left, Hamlet. TO. THE. LEFT.
Mark Antony, Roman Sex God.
Just look at this sand dusted solider in his flirty skirt! A Roman senator, a solider, a hedonist. Mark Antony commanded huge armies and definitely could have found glory in successful wars in Macedonia but this sandaled adonis blew it all off to romance Cleopatra in front of a bunch of eunuchs and handmaids in Egypt. Romans threw mad shade on Cleo, calling her a 'gypsy' and a 'strumpet' but Mark was having none of it! He could have ruled the Western world but he threw it away with this cry:
Let Rome in Tiber melt, and the wide arch
Of the ranged empire fall! Here is my space!
Kingdoms are clay!
Rank Organisation
Macduff, existentialist daddy from Macbeth
You cannot just flit around Scotland killing off kings to quench your ambition! Macduff gets that, he is the only moral figure in the twisted and blood-soaked world of the Scottish play. He is the ethical 'goodness' to Macbeth's perverse evil. After Macbeth goes off on a murder-bender killing off the king (formal term: regicide) and Macduff's family, Macduff slips into a tortured grief but then bootstraps himself up with this panty-dropping line: “But I must also feel it as a man.”
Yes! FEEL IT, YOU AXE WIELDING ANGEL! Then he beheads Macbeth.
National Theatre Live
Team Romeo
I mean, right? He is the consummate teenage love angel, you'd rather eat glass than get off the phone with him. He is both Team Edward and Team Jacob wrapped in a crushed velvet cape and leggings perched beneath your balcony. Dramatic, forbidden, virginal, adoring. He is the stuff which mash notes are made of. Put on your West Side Story soundtrack and sob it out, ladies.
Paramount
Bottom from Midsummer Night's Dream
Two words: donkey dick.
Oil on canvas by Henry Fuseli
