Hello, My Future Wife – Entertainably

Thank you for responding to my online dating ad. Allow me to give you a tour of the home that we can share together.

Here is my bookshelf. We can fill it with your favorite books, like "Twilight" if you like.

Here is my opulent bathroom. See the bidet? That is like a shower for your butt.

We can take a bath together while looking at my beautiful murals. I'll make a shampoo mohawk for myself, tee hee.

I've slipped into something more confortable for the rest of the tour of your potential new home.

Here is my bookshelf. We can fill it with your favorite books, like "Twilight" if you like.